The Body Language Habits You Don’t Know Are Hurting Your Image

Most of us know to stand up straight and make eye contact. But there's a whole world of subtle signals that can quietly work against the image we're trying to project without us realizing it.

Whether you're leading a meeting, making small talk at a networking event, or just showing up day-to-day, your body language is doing a lot of the talking. Let's look at a few habits that might give off an unintended message and find some easy ways to fix them.

Over-Nodding

A nod is a great way to show you're listening, but it can be more distracting than helpful when it turns into constant head bobbing. I didn't realize how much I was doing it until I saw myself on video. Boy, that was an eye-opener. Awareness really is a gift, and yes, I'm still working on it.

What to do instead:

• Nod once or twice at key moments

• Smile and use eye contact to show engagement

Tense Jaw or Tight Lips

Stress loves to show up on your face. A clenched jaw or pursed lips can make you look irritated or withdrawn, even if you're just concentrating.

Quick reset:

• Take a deep breath before you speak to release facial tension

• Soften your expression by parting your lips with a small, gentle smile

Hiding Behind Objects

Holding your backpack or notebook like a shield might feel comforting, but it can signal discomfort or defensiveness.

A better option:

• Rest items lightly on a table or hold them low at your side

• Keep your hands visible and open when possible

Fidgeting Hands or Feet

Tapping your fingers, bouncing your knee, or shifting your weight sends nervous or impatient signals even if you're calm.

What works better:

• Rest your hands loosely in front of you or at your sides

• Keep your feet on the ground about shoulder-width apart

Posture That Shrinks Instead of Supports You

Slouching, collapsing your shoulders, or leaning too far to one side can make you seem unsure or apologetic.

Simple fix:

• Use the back of your chair for support instead of sitting on the edge

• Roll your shoulders back and imagine a string gently lifting you from the top of your head to the sky

Twisting Your Hair

Hair twirling might seem playful, but in professional settings, it can be a giveaway that you're feeling nervous. Even more confusing, it can sometimes be misread as flirtatious, which is definitely not the message you want to send at work.

Try this adjustment:

• Wear your hair up, or use more hairspray than usual for a few days

• If you have a friend willing to help, ask them to bring it to your attention when they see you do it

Here's a helpful resource: Today Show: Is Hair Twirling Normal?

Yawning

This is a tricky one because some of us (me) think yawning is involuntary, but know that when you do it, others in the room can read it as boredom or disinterest.

To reset:

• Take a few deep breaths through your nose and exhale slowly

• Sip cold water

The way we carry ourselves can either open doors or close them. The good news is that once you start noticing these small habits, you can work on them. It is not about being perfect. It is about being present, paying attention, and letting your body language reflect the confident, thoughtful person you already are. You've got this!