Please Don’t CC the Principal: Communication Tips for the School Year Ahead

The start of school comes with supply lists, new schedules, and plenty of big feelings for students, parents, and teachers. Whether you're emailing a teacher for the first time or checking in about an assignment, what you say and how you say it matters.

Connecting students, parents, and teachers through back-to-school etiquette and communication tips.

Good communication builds trust and relationships, especially in those early weeks when everyone is settling into a routine. Here are a few tips to help your messages land the right way this school year.

Clear Communication Chains

When something goes wrong or feels unclear, it's tempting to copy the principal to show you're serious. But doing that can come off as aggressive or disrespectful. Most issues can (and should) be handled directly with the teacher. Give them a chance to respond and resist the urge to take your concern straight to the top.

What to say:

"Hi, Ms. Ramirez, I wanted to check in about the reading homework. My son wasn't sure what to bring tomorrow. Can you clarify?"

Ask First, Assume the Best

If your child comes home upset, take a breath before typing. Ask a few questions and remember that one side of the story isn't the whole picture. Approach the conversation with curiosity and assume good intentions.

Instead of: "Why did you call my child out in front of the class?"

Try: "My child came home feeling embarrassed about something in class today. I'd love your perspective before we talk more at home."

Support from the Sidelines

Middle school is a great time to begin teaching students how to communicate directly with their teachers. They don't need to write a long essay. A respectful message is enough. The more they practice, the easier it becomes.

Simple student email:

"Hi, Mr. Lee, I was confused about the last math problem on the homework. Can I ask you about it tomorrow during my study period?"

Parents can help coach from the sidelines, but as kids get older, stepping back gives them the opportunity to grow.

This Is Where Professionalism Starts

At a recent college orientation, I was surprised by how many different ways instructors are using to keep up with students. Some rely on email, others use apps, Canvas announcements, or even group chats. As a mom, part of me wishes they'd all just pick one so my freshman never misses a message. Then I take a deep breath and think, okay, Momma, let it go. He'll figure it out.

For students headed to college, this is the year to practice writing messages that sound professional and respectful. No “bruh,” no emojis. Use a good subject line, complete sentences, and clear punctuation.

What works:

Subject: Question About Quiz Format

Hi Professor James,

I had a quick question about the quiz format for tomorrow's class. Will it include short answer or just multiple choice?

Thank you,

Taylor

Avoid asking questions that were already answered in class. Emailing to ask, "What did I miss?" after skipping class? That's a question for a classmate, not your professor.

A Note to Parents of College Students

Unless there's a medical emergency or a serious red flag, parents should not be emailing college professors. This is your student's time to grow, take responsibility, and learn how to advocate for themselves.

I get it. Letting go of the urge to step in is tough. But this is their time to speak up, learn, and sometimes mess up. And that's okay.

Respectful Messages Get Results

Whether you're a parent reaching out to a teacher or a college student emailing a professor, well-written and respectful messages will make the grade every time. Keep it clear, keep it kind, and you'll already be ahead of the curve.